Enough with the Chuck Norris stuff:
Personally, I’d like to believe that it’s a fierce Razorback spirit driving this campaign. But breaking news reporter Hector Castro, real estate reporter Aubrey Cohen and I have debated this morning, and come up with much better reasons. Here they are:
1) Washington voters began supporting Huckabee after they learned his ardent supporter, Chuck Norris, had a solution to the problem of tearing down the viaduct – a roundhouse kick.
2) Or maybe it was Chuck’s plan to solve the ferry commuter problems by drinking Elliott Bay so people could drive to work. (or soaking up Elliott Bay with his chest hair).
3) Chuck Norris planned to solve the problem of Hanford’s nuclear waste by eating it.
4) Norris planned to lay all the track work for a statewide light rail system … on Saturday, after breakfast.
5) Chuck would protect us from the Canadians, Invasion U.S.A.-style, and protect the good conservatives of Washington from the Communist Seattle hordes.
6) He could also eat so many apples that we’d double their price on the world market.