Well, they haven’t lost their wit, anyway — or at least “Iowahawk” hasn’t. Just got this from Vladimir Bukovsky:
London – British public safety officials today increased the nationalalert level to “Quite Elevated Indeed” — the highest category possible– and appealed to UK citizens to “keep a sharp lookout for diversepeople engaged in activities.”
“We ask the public to report any behaviors by various people that may ormay not be of a suspicious nature,” said Lt. Clive Jameson of theMetropolitan Police Service. “We further ask the public to be especiallyvigilant for activities of broad stratas of people who may be fromcountries of some sort, especially those within the eastern and/orwestern hemisphere.”
The elevated alert levels come on the heels of a week when London andGlasgow narrowly escaped potential events that intelligence experts saymay have been related to diverse groups of people doing things.Initially police had specifically asked the public for informationrelating to doctors driving automobiles, but that initial warningbrought angry denunciations from the British Medical Association and theUK Automobile Association.
“This directive unfairly singles out and targets British medicalprofessionals, a great many of whom are loyal and patriotic citizens,”complained Dr. Hamish Meldrum, chairman of the BMA. “The fact that someof the people involved in the recent unfortunate events may have beendoctors is totally coincidental, just as if they had been accountants,plumbers, or random members of a deranged apocalyptic religious cult.” Sir Trevor Chinn, Chairman of the UKAA, warned that the earlierdirective would “spark a backlash against the British motoring communityand promote a climate of fear and carophobia.”
On Tuesday, new British Prime Minister Gordon Brown met withrepresentatives of the medical and car communities and announced thatthe government would henceforth prohibit occupational andtransportational profiling by public officials. Brown said furthergovernment communications would prohibit the use of certain prejudicialwords like “doctor,” “Vauxhall,” “podiatrist,” “propane,” “Asia,””drive,” “ticking noises,” “panic,” and “the.” Brown also announced theformation of a blue ribbon multicultural community advisory boardchaired by Dr. Mohammed Ibn-Yasin of the UK Islamic Podiatric and CarBombing Club.
In the latest warning, Metropolitan Police said Scotland Yard had set upspecial telephone and internet hotlines for citizens to report tips ofpossible activities by other people, including “excessive use of cellphones and computers.”
“An informed and vigilant London is our eyes and ears, and our best hopefor thwarting these diverse groups of people from various countries andbackgrounds and occupations who are engaged in, or potentially planningactivities of some sort,” said Jameson. But the spokesman also saidpublic involvement should stop there.
“We are asking for vigilance, not vigilantes,” said Jameson. “Afterreporting alleged activities, the public should wait for theprofessionals, who have the necessary multicultural training and snappyreflective uniforms to prevent and/or clean up afterwards.”
“After diversity awareness, our paramount goal is public safety,” addedJameson. “As we saw recently in Glasgow, if a well-meaning but untrainedcitizen steps in and tries to stop a diverse person of activity bykicking him or her in the testicles, he or she could suffer a painfultendon injury.”
Nigel Brunton, a spokesman for the British Society of Diverse PeopleDoing Various Things, said his organization was “cooperating fully” withpolice, but said he felt it unfair that it was being singled out.
“In every group there’s bound to be a few bad apples,” said Brunton. “Orsome sort of pomaceous fruit of some kind.”