Today, there was published a silly poll, too silly, conducted by Monmouth University that found 18 percent of Americans willing to claim that Taylor Swift “is part of a covert effort to help President Joe Biden win the 2024 election.” Initially, one can’t help but squint at the findings, as ages 55+ appear overrepresented by five points (38 percent). Also, the way the question is worded is vague enough to be answered in the affirmative when merely agreeing that Swift may stump for Biden at some point. The kicker comes later, however. First, the breakdown.
Monmouth’s report reads:
Just under half (46%) of the American public has heard something about Swift being part of a supposed covert government effort to help Biden win the 2024 presidential election. Just under 1 in 5 Americans (18%) believe such a conspiracy involving Swift exists. Fully 71% of those who believe this identify with or lean toward the Republican Party and 83% indicate they are likely to support Donald Trump in the fall. Also, nearly three-quarters (73%) of those who believe the Swift conspiracy also believe the 2020 election outcome was fraudulent.
A strong correlation between election-fraud claims and anti-Swiftism makes sense. If deceased Chicagoans, voting machines, and Dane County are in on the fix, well, Taylor Swift might as well be too. But almost half of the Taylor Swift accusers hadn’t even heard of the hypothesis until the proctor asked about Swift’s involvement. From Monmouth:
It should be noted that the group of poll respondents who accept the Swift story as fact includes some people who claim to have been unaware of it (i.e., 42% of those who say the conspiracy exists also say they had not heard about it before being contacted by Monmouth).
In other words, (and taking some liberties for humor’s sake), Jethro at Shady Rest picks up the phone and is told by the proctor that Taylor Swift (whom he is aware of because his wife insisted they buy a TSwift pencil case for their granddaughter) is alleged to be stealing the election for Joe Biden in 2024. His response: “You better believe I believe it.” Knee-jerk conspiracism is delightful in small doses — like when you’re at a party and your buddy starts telling a girl that Finland isn’t real. The two of you collude to convince her by railing against the USSR’s longstanding propaganda arm designed to convince the West that there were Finns living where there was actually a DMZ and weapons-research lab under Tampere. Do Jethro or Luther know the first thing about anything? Of course not. It’s all tomfoolery to pass the time.
Outside of the mentally ill, the only Americans who believe Taylor Swift is running an op for Biden are Twitter celebrities who believe that pitching the idea to their followers will pay for a trip to Moscow to busk in that gilded city’s subway with Tucker.