‘I Am Mother!’

S aturday Night Live alumna Maya Rudolph returned to host the show over Mother’s Day weekend, making note of her own status as a mom and celebrating fellow mothers. She was dubbed “Mother of the House of Rockefeller” and recounted some of the characters she played throughout the years. I stopped watching SNL regularly when Adam Sandler’s “Opera Man” retired, so some of the performance was lost on me. But this wasn’t: Even in a comedic context, mainstream, popular culture was celebrating motherhood.

That’s no small thing. We’re about to hit two years since Roe v. Wade was ended by the Supreme Court, and there is so much anger, confusion, and sadness. There is a sense that fertility is a preexisting medical condition and pregnancy is to be avoided until the perfect plan is in place.

I have yet to meet a person who has a perfect plan in place for anything, never mind family life.

Rudolph’s performance reminded me of a video that a Canadian group, Choice42, put together a few years ago. “So, You’re Pregnant . . .,” is the title. It’s aimed at women — and girls — who weren’t looking to have a baby but are now mothers, even if it’s agonizing to see it that way, and deserve support to embrace that reality rather than be pushed to end their pregnancy.

“You have a choice. Take a breath. You can do this,” the video tells the woman watching. It’s the same kind of message women and girls hear if they find themselves in pro-life pregnancy clinics. “We’re talking about another human being here. And not just any human being. Your baby. For whatever reason, this child was given to you. You were chosen to be this child’s mother. And no matter what’s going on in your life, you can rise up and take this on. You can rock this.”

The narrator goes on to acknowledge how abortion may be suggested even by the people closest to her. A woman who has for decades helped women who want to have their babies in New York has described to me how there is often a “search-and-destroy mission” if the woman is poor or single or black or Hispanic. We know that more black babies are aborted in New York City than born, and this is part of the reason.

And that mission is not necessarily malicious. More of us are united by compassion than we realize. We do know that abortion in America has its roots in eugenics — racism. As these facts became more broadly acknowledged in recent years, the flagship Planned Parenthood clinic in New York took the name of its founder, Margaret Sanger, off its building, and eventually a street sign with her name was removed. Most of the people working in that building are likely trying to help women and their own families.

But life is complicated. Not the fact of it. Follow the science, as it has been said. But it is expensive. And it is hard to find resources. And so much of U.S. education is about preparing young people for financial and professional success, not parenthood. In other words: Most of our education is not about what is really important.

Even if you’re not a mother or father — mothers and fathers need everyone willing to step up to the plate. I loved the spirit of Rudolph’s SNL feature because it conveyed this message: Mothers rock. I could imagine how a mom who is going it on her own, having made the choice to embrace her motherhood, would appreciate the celebration and vote of confidence. Mothers need more of that.

“You’re already this baby’s mother. This child is already in this world, living and growing inside you,” Choice42 emphasizes. As the name suggests, the organization wants women and girls to not be afraid of the fact that there are two of them now. This is not “My body, my choice.” This is a love story.

And when talking about mothers, we can’t forget those who have grievously lost their babies through miscarriage — or shortly after birth. And those who have heroically chosen adoption. And those who don’t know what to do with the sorrow of abortion. And, yes, there are women who are sources of support and wisdom who are not raising children in the traditional way. Civil society — each and every one of us — needs them, too. The women who notice and come to our aid because, all too often, the motherly instinct is sensitive to universal human needs.

The Choice42 video culminates by showing the pregnant mother as a superhero, fighting for her baby against all the medical, cultural, and personal influences pressuring her to end the life of her child. Rudolph did look a bit like a superhero in her opening. And while I know SNL had no pro-life message in mind, I wouldn’t be shocked if the former cast member encouraged mothers who were watching.

I sure pray she did. And we can do that. We can be pro-life or pro-choice and try to accompany one another regardless of politics.

Women feel beleaguered. Politics and media don’t help. I often worry that pro-life activists — among whom I count myself — don’t always, either. For many of us, this is actually not about a culture war but about love. The message Choice42 offers is: We will help. And: Mothers are capable of amazing things. So, be not afraid to say: “I am mother.” And how about we all rally to her?

This column is based on one available through Andrews McMeel Universal’s Newspaper Enterprise Association.