1. Put “hamburger buns on your butt” to protest the objectification of women in hamburger advertisements. After all, those advertisements contribute to rape.
An article in Bustle — titled “8 Feminist Concepts To Dress As For Halloween, Because You Can Have Fun And Make A Statement About The Gender Binary At The Same Time” – suggests ways to use Halloween costume to protest the way women are objectified in advertisements: One suggestion: Attach objects to your body. After all, using beautiful women in advertising “contributes to rape culture.” (Fighting sexual assault, one hamburger-bun butt at a time!)
In case you want to be able to sit down on Halloween without leaving crumbs on your friend’s couch, the article suggests that another way to fight objectification is to tape a bunch of mail all over your glasses in protest of the “male gaze.”
2. Tape examples of microaggressions to your body! After all, people will probably ask you what the hell you’re supposed to be — and then you will get the “chance to explain what microaggressions are” are all night!
The Bustle article also suggests using a similar concept for a costume that fights “intersectionality” — that is, “the idea that you cannot talk about gender, race, class, ability status, size, sexual orientation, or any other facet of identity without also discussing other categories used to oppress people,” i.e., not being able to talk about the wage gap without talking about how it’s even worse for black women — by wearing a paper chain with things like “gender identity” and “neurodiversity” on the links. It explains that you can even turn this into a “group costume” by writing different terms on different people and “holding hands or linking arms throughout the night.”
FYI: If you want to do any of this kind of stuff, you are not invited to my party. Sorry, I’m just one of those people with the radical belief that Halloween is supposed to be fun. Oh, and if I see any large group blocking the sidewalks by linking arms, I will call them out for oppressing me.
3. If you’re going to wear a “slutty costume,” write feminist, anti-rape-culture statements on the naked parts of your body.
“If you want your ‘slutty’ costume to have a message . . . rite words like ‘slut’ and ‘asking for it’ on the parts of your body that your costume leaves bare,” Bustle suggests.
It’s not clear whether or not this applies to another one of Bustle’s suggestions, which is to dress up like a sexy, lingerie-clad Mary (yes, as in the mother of Jesus) to protest the “classification of women as either nonsexual, innocent virgins or dirty, promiscuous ‘whores.’”
4. If you think any sort of cowboys-and-Indians theme is okay, that’s because you’re “blind.”
In an article in the Huffington Post about why politically correct costumes are so important, author Julie Schemmer establishes her credibility by explaining that she was the one smart and culturally aware enough to understand that a “cowboys and Indians” themed party at her school was super offensive — even though to “the blind eye, [it] seems like a great event.” In fact, she explains, this kind of thing “glorifies . . . mass destruction, annihilation, and cultural genocide,” and any related costumes would obviously do the same.
So, if you are learning this for the first time, it’s not really your fault — it’s just that you are not as smart as the teenager who wrote this article. How nice of her to keep us bigots informed!
Oh, and apparently no one told Schemmer that the word “blind” is actually considered a “violent” word among social-justice warriors now. I’m not mad at her for not knowing, though — I just feel very blessed to be so much more culturally aware.
#share#
5. Wearing a Halloween costume that includes a poncho is racist. Instead, “tune into [sic] Latin American TV to see what Mexican culture is actually about.”
This suggestion comes from a Mic article titled “7 Offensive Halloween Costumes It’s Time to Retire — and What To Try Instead.” The use of the word “instead” is really interesting here, especially considering that wearing an article of clothing and watching a television show are not comparable activities. Is the author suggesting that I stay home on Halloween and watch Latin TV? Who knows.
6. If you’re the type of person that thinks “Relax — it’s just a costume,” that’s because you and “all your friends” are racist.
#related#“You’ll hear this a lot during Halloween: ‘Relax — it’s just a costume,’” an article in Refinery 29 states, before explaining why thinking this way is actually really bad.
“Translation: I don’t care that much about the implications of this costume, because those implications don’t affect me,” it explains. “A racist costume isn’t a problem if you’re a racist, and all your friends are racist, too!”it continues.
Uh.
7. If you dress as a sexy nurse or sexy teacher, it’s kind of your fault that women are paid less.
A Pinterest photo that has been circulating the web explains that sexy costumes of “professions conventionally dominated by women,” such as nurses and teachers, just “perpetuates their status as ‘lesser’ careers, thus contributing to women’s work remaining underpaid and disrespected.”
It kind of seems less than feminist to not let women decide for themselves whether or not to wear these costumes. But what do I know? I’m just a woman!